For a while now I have been dying to try the Poppi sodas. From what I hear, they are actually pretty good considering how low their calories are for a soda. So, this week, I finally unleashed my inner soda detective and tried every flavor. Here’s the sparkling showdown from the not-so-great to the absolute best!

6. Doc Pop – 2/5:

Oh, “Doc Pop,” I had such high hopes for you, but you let me down. This soda doesn’t even taste like Dr. Pepper! It’s like they tried to mimic the cool cousin at family reunions but ended up with the weird uncle who’s just watching you. It’s as if someone just played a cruel joke and dumped sugar into a soda with a bad flavor. Save your money; this one’s not worth it. If you’re craving Dr. Pepper, head to the store because there’s no substitute for the real deal. Doc Pop, you’re like the understudy who tried, but it’s just not the same without the star.

5. Watermelon – 2.5/5:

Ah, watermelon, the unsung hero of summer and spring, right? But, brace yourselves for a tale of deep despair and shattered dreams. I had such high hopes, you know, like planning the greatest summer road trip ever but ending up stuck in traffic. This watermelon soda was a rollercoaster of depression.

It’s better than Dr. Pop, I’ll give it that much, but it’s like biting into a watermelon, and suddenly it tastes like a watermelon-flavored Jolly Rancher gone wrong. It’s like watermelon’s distant, questionable cousin that nobody invited to the family reunion. This soda is what happens when you mix watermelon with a lemon that has seen better days and then you decide to water it down.

I expected greatness, excellence, joy, satisfaction – all those good things, you know? But did I get any of that? Nope. If you’re a watermelon enthusiast, like my brother (I made him try it too), the look of disappointment on his face could compete with Oscar-worthy performances. In all honesty, this one shouldn’t even make the soda cut. It’s like the “almost made it to the party” friend that we all secretly avoid inviting.

4. Orange – 3/5:

It’s decent but about as thrilling as a library on a Saturday night. If you’re an orange soda fan, you won’t notice the difference. I hoped diet soda would be exciting, but alas, this one’s a yawn. Orange Fanta is the popular kid at the soda party, stealing the spotlight. While “Orange” isn’t bad, it’s like a backup dancer at the soda show. A decent alternative for orange soda lovers, but if you want a party in your mouth, this is not the one.

3. Raspberry Rose – 3.5/5:

Now, about Raspberry Rose – we just couldn’t seem to hit it off! You see, I have a soft spot for raspberry-flavored sodas; they usually hit all the right notes. But, alas, this one was like a raspberry that forgot to put on its fancy outfit for the soda party. It’s got the flavor, sure, but it’s lacking that spark, that pizzazz, I was hoping for. It’s like trying to light a firecracker, but you only get a teeny sparkler.

This raspberry soda gets a 3.5 on the rank. It’s better than the orange, but it’s like barely winning a race with a sloth – you made it, but it wasn’t the most thrilling victory. I don’t know many people who are crazy for raspberry soda, so I’ll give it a hesitant thumbs up. It’s not terrible, but it’s also not painting any soda masterpieces or writing any soda symphonies. It’s just…raspberry, and that’s about it.

2. Strawberry Lemon – 4/5:

I was in the depths of soda despair, but then, a ray of hope burst through the carbonated clouds! Enter Strawberry Lemon, the superhero of this soda saga. This one isn’t just good; it’s a game-changer.

It’s like a fizzy miracle! Strawberry Lemon doesn’t just taste like actual soda; it’s like carbonated strawberry lemonade on a grand flavor expedition. The sweetness and the sourness had a dance-off and created an orchestra of delightful explosions in your mouth. It’s like a flavor fiesta that comes with its own confetti cannon.

If you’re considering any soda from this lineup and secretly hope to get a little magic from a diet soda, this is the one to go for. It’s like diet soda’s secret superhero disguise – you’d never guess it’s low-calorie. It’s like the Selena Gomez of sodas.

If you love lemonade, adore strawberry lemonade, or are just mildly fond of strawberries, Strawberry Lemon is your jam. It’s perfect for sipping on a scorching summer day or for those epic couch potato moments when you just want to chill and do absolutely nothing – if you have the time for it, of course.

1. Ginger Lime – 5/5:

I’m not kidding; Ginger Lime is my absolute favorite in this bunch. If you’re into tangy, sour things or you adore lemonade with just the right sweetness, this is your soul-soda-mate. It’s got that zing without going overboard. You can’t even taste the ginger, but it’s working its magic on your immune system and gut like a soda superhero.

Oh, and get this: these sodas are like the James Bond of beverages – they’ve got a secret mission. They’re probiotic sodas, here to help your gut and your immune system while you sip. Whether or not that’s scientifically proven is a debate for another day, but it’s music to our soda-loving ears.

Ginger Lime, my friends, is not just a five out of five; it’s a solid 10 out of 10 – the undisputed soda champion of this flavor showdown. Don’t just try it; embrace it. It’s a game-changer!

If you’re stuck in a sugar battle with your parents or are sugar-conscious, this brand is your saving grace. While some flavors might have been a bit blah for me, I recommend giving a few of them a whirl. Just do yourself a favor – skip the “Doc Pop” and “Watermelon,” they’re like the villains of the soda world. The rest, though? A soda adventure waiting to happen.

In our grand flavor parade, “Ginger Lime” takes the crown as the unbeatable champion. It’s like the cool kid at school, the one everyone secretly wishes they could be. With its zesty ginger twist and limey charm, it’s the flavor that turns mundane sips into a full-blown soda spectacle.

Let your taste buds join the fun, and embrace the bold and the sassy! Life’s too short to sip boring soda, after all! In the world of Poppi, there’s a flavor for every mood and every occasion, but “Ginger Lime” stands tall as the ultimate champion. Cheers to the flavor fiesta that makes high school a whole lot fizzier and a whole lot more exciting!